The Lighter Side_2

Night Rats

By: Steph Mendez '07

We wait...and wait...and wait. Someone asks the nightly question, “When will she close her door?” We spend every night creeping down the hall between eleven and twelve to see if the ornament that hangs centered on her door is aligned with the hall and if the light that seeps through the rim of her wooden door has faded to blackness.

11:35: “Lets check.” One step...two step... “Shhhh, stop dragging your feet.” Three step...four step...halfway down the hall and we already know she's still awake by the blaring of her television. We walk back to our rooms and wait.

11:55: We gather together with the same question of whether she's awake or not. We check again, this time there's three of us. One step, two step, three steps...BAAAAMMMM!! A quiet scream is heard. “Run!” Like rats in a dark sewer who have just been discovered by a human's flashlight, we bolt back to our rooms.

There's one rule when checking on her: be discrete. It makes the investigative process a bit difficult when someone runs into a box or wall causing a loud noise because now she's going to check the hall or rooms and thus the door will stay open for at least twenty more minutes, well at least that's what our paranoia leads us to believe.

We get back to the room and discuss what our expedition will be tonight. Suggestion #1 from Clumsy says, “Lets take one of the school vans for a ride to Tyrone, the keys are in the glove compartment.”

12:15: Our eyes are growing heavy but we need to check again. We leave the clumsy one behind so now there are two again tip-toeing down the dark brown carpet lined with white walls and wooden door on each side. One step, two step...halfway there yes! Victory! The bear has gone into hibernation. Now the adventures may begin!

Expulsion isn't the idea of our mission, plus she just ran into a box when she was supposed to be being discrete. Keys to a school vehicle might not be the best idea for such a person. Mission aborted Captain Carlos!

Suggestion two comes from the Russian Jew who seems to believe it would be hilarious to go to each girl's room and put whip-cream Hitler mustaches on them and marker swastikas on each girls' forehead as payback for what the Nazis did to her ancestors. Ummm, political issues are a little too intense for this late at night. I think we're going to have to veto this petition. Mission aborted Lieutenant Lanny!

Ideas are running low; I suggest stealing the peach rings from the security guard, but it's the third night this week that his peach rings would be mysteriously missing courtesy of night walkers, and I don't think we should test our luck.

It's now quarter to one and we have yet to come up with a plan of action. Our minds are running on empty and one more suggestion comes up: “Good night!”

Probably the best idea so far.